It was a tiring, disheartening, and frustrating week for me and my friends. It was a bad week where all negative vibes and intentions from negative people around were mixed in a bowl, rolled and shaped into a meatball then thrown right at your clueless face when you were at your most defenseless and unprepared self. What makes it more depressing is the sight of your good friend crying in front of people who were just as clueless as she is and was placed in a middle of a well orchestrated public humiliation seasoned with a twist of betrayal. I salute my dear friend for her courage and I despise myself for not having that same courage to speak up and defend my name and my friends' or just say my piece.
I really wanted to blog all my hate, my frustrations, my irritations, the hurt inside and how I loathe these people last Thursday night right after that horrible scene at the meeting. But I decided to sleep it off and postpone the i-hate-these-people blogging. It was indeed God's grace. Saturday morning, I woke up at 4am and felt the urge to release that excruciating pain in me and that flood of hate surging in my blood. I went out of my house and headed to People's Park. Clad in my white Nike rubber shoes, I started walking around the park with the early morning joggers. The place was full of people from all walks of life...but they all turned invisible to me as I was making a few rounds of brisk walking.
Thoughts of the past days and the emotions which enveloped me were coming again. As I gradually increased my speed, I was like moved into a trance as I was putting all my energy in my legs and feeling the prickly heat inside my body. Unmindful of the people in the park, I kept on walking and walking with my mind and heart racing, fighting off the negativity lurking in me. It was just like being the only person in a deserted place. The walk was healing me. As my body paced and my heart was beating so fast, I was slowly dusting off the cobwebs of hate and wiping out the frustrations that are clouding me. I stopped after an hour of seemingly endless rounds of walking ...feeling light, relieved and a little free of hostility and hate. Amazingly, my newly pampered and manicured feet wrapped in rubber shoes never got tired after that walk and even my legs were without cramps the whole day. It was a surprise.
God indeed has so much surprises in store for all of us. Another came today as I tuned in to my favorite Sunday show. With my blogging plans still on hold, God surprised me with an unexpected message through the story of Jonah. This week was a Jonah experience. I ran away from God and like Jonah who was asked by God to change the people in Nineveh, I judged quickly and label others as bad. I refused to see these people around me the way God sees them because what overpowered me was hate. I was blinded by my emotions.
The walk in the park and the message by Bo Sanchez were God's little surprises to me. This beautiful weekend thought me to just accept the people who are difficult to accept and their weaknesses because I myself has my own sets of limitations and limps-- limps which can also make me unacceptable for others. I am broken, weak and hurt and so they are. God is telling me to be more accepting and forgiving of others...to be more understanding and to try to be like Jesus even if it is hard to do. The reason why we cannot accept other people and their weaknesses is because we do not accept our own weaknesses.
Today, as I prepare myself for another week, I will try to be more accepting and forgiving. God will never fail me and He will put his arms around me despite my brokenness and handicap and knowing this, the more I should be understanding of people and their limitations. Right at this moment as I end this blog entry, I am slowly draining away the poisons of rage and bitterness. I will try to release the anger and irritation even if I know that it is difficult because I don't want to give my life and my future to these people and to live forever in hate.
God's surprises come in different forms and from different people. Not all surprises come from nicely wrapped gift boxes. We just have to listen more and see beyond the external.
Happy Sunday!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Sunday, February 5, 2012
feet on the ground
Its 4AM and 4 hours to go before the SMEMCO anniversary celebration. Feeling a little rested and little better after last night's bout with stomach pains, I woke up with so much optimism and excitement in my heart. I still don't have the welcome remarks prepared for the program later so here I am in front of my brother's laptop thinking of how to start my speech.
well I better begin in 5...4...3...2...1
I love Sundays. Sundays are always special. Today February 5, 2012 is an extra special Sunday because we are celebrating our SMEMCO's 14th anniversary. It is a little extra special because today is also ate Bing Sagaray's birthday.
My regular Sunday would never be complete without this habit which I recently started after I heard it from Mr. Bayogos. Every Sunday morning, I would always make sure that I won't miss the talk of Bo Sanchez on TV. I missed today's episode since I am here celebrating this special Sunday with you and because of that I might as well share with you a message from Bo a few episodes ago.
It says : THE GREATER YOU BECOME, THE MORE HUMBLE YOU SHOULD BE. TO BE HUMBLE, YOU SHOULD THINK OF OTHER PEOPLE AS GREATER THAN YOU ARE.
I would like to share this beautiful message with you because this is the greatest lesson SMEMCO has taught me over the years. To be humble means to be always be of service to others even if sometimes it is an additional load of work on your part. To be humble is to keep your feet on the ground and not let your position intimidate other people. To be humble is to smile and be accommodating despite difficult situations and in front of difficult people. To be humble is to be patient and understanding of other people's problems which are oftentimes financial. To be humble is not uttering hurting words to others and to make things a little less complicated for them. Humility is not owning and doing everything on your own but to delegate tasks because others can do things better and never fail to acknowledge their efforts and be generous with appreciation. Humility is listening to others and learning from their wisdom. SMEMCO has truly shaped and helped me become a better person. It has taught me things I would never ever learn from books, seminars or masteral studies. It has taught me valuable lessons in life that is why my heart is always for SMEMCO.
SMEMCO started from humble beginnings initiated by the people who saw its potential and now 14 years later, our cooperative has grown bigger, has faced a lot of changes and challenges, and has evolved into 8.3M net worth cooperative from 100 thousand starting capital. As we grow bigger and greater, SMEMCO will always remain humble and will never stop learning from other people and from institutions. It will continue to seek guidance, be open to present realities in life and will never close its doors to opportunities. It will stay strong for more years because of its greatest foundation--- you, your passion and love for this cooperative.
My welcome remarks is getting longer so I would like to end this by thanking all of you for being there during my journey as a Chairperson of SMEMCO. Thank you to the BOD- Ate Dors, Sir Luis, Ate Sonia, Ate Anabel, Ate Narlina and Oliver. To the officers –ate celia, syensi inday and Suzanne. And to our staff Jeff and Elvie. It was a little less difficult ride for me because you were there to guide and support me. And to all of you, mga igsoon sa kooperatiba, daghang salamat. Please do not give up on SMEMCO.
Welcome to this celebration and enjoy this beautiful Sunday!
well I better begin in 5...4...3...2...1
I love Sundays. Sundays are always special. Today February 5, 2012 is an extra special Sunday because we are celebrating our SMEMCO's 14th anniversary. It is a little extra special because today is also ate Bing Sagaray's birthday.
My regular Sunday would never be complete without this habit which I recently started after I heard it from Mr. Bayogos. Every Sunday morning, I would always make sure that I won't miss the talk of Bo Sanchez on TV. I missed today's episode since I am here celebrating this special Sunday with you and because of that I might as well share with you a message from Bo a few episodes ago.
It says : THE GREATER YOU BECOME, THE MORE HUMBLE YOU SHOULD BE. TO BE HUMBLE, YOU SHOULD THINK OF OTHER PEOPLE AS GREATER THAN YOU ARE.
I would like to share this beautiful message with you because this is the greatest lesson SMEMCO has taught me over the years. To be humble means to be always be of service to others even if sometimes it is an additional load of work on your part. To be humble is to keep your feet on the ground and not let your position intimidate other people. To be humble is to smile and be accommodating despite difficult situations and in front of difficult people. To be humble is to be patient and understanding of other people's problems which are oftentimes financial. To be humble is not uttering hurting words to others and to make things a little less complicated for them. Humility is not owning and doing everything on your own but to delegate tasks because others can do things better and never fail to acknowledge their efforts and be generous with appreciation. Humility is listening to others and learning from their wisdom. SMEMCO has truly shaped and helped me become a better person. It has taught me things I would never ever learn from books, seminars or masteral studies. It has taught me valuable lessons in life that is why my heart is always for SMEMCO.
SMEMCO started from humble beginnings initiated by the people who saw its potential and now 14 years later, our cooperative has grown bigger, has faced a lot of changes and challenges, and has evolved into 8.3M net worth cooperative from 100 thousand starting capital. As we grow bigger and greater, SMEMCO will always remain humble and will never stop learning from other people and from institutions. It will continue to seek guidance, be open to present realities in life and will never close its doors to opportunities. It will stay strong for more years because of its greatest foundation--- you, your passion and love for this cooperative.
My welcome remarks is getting longer so I would like to end this by thanking all of you for being there during my journey as a Chairperson of SMEMCO. Thank you to the BOD- Ate Dors, Sir Luis, Ate Sonia, Ate Anabel, Ate Narlina and Oliver. To the officers –ate celia, syensi inday and Suzanne. And to our staff Jeff and Elvie. It was a little less difficult ride for me because you were there to guide and support me. And to all of you, mga igsoon sa kooperatiba, daghang salamat. Please do not give up on SMEMCO.
Welcome to this celebration and enjoy this beautiful Sunday!
Monday, January 30, 2012
another step
Its the last day of my birthday month and I'm looking forward to that royal blue wedding that I have been dreaming of and waiting for with much excitement and love. I long for that day that I will be wearing my blue pair of shoes with my wedding gown as I walk down the aisle to the man I love.
It has always been my prayer ever since Kit and I started planning for this wedding that God will be there sending angels to guide us in every step we take before that special day. My morning prayer will always be offering all our plans to the Lord and let him sort out whatever is best for the two of us. I pray that whatever we plan and decide it will be His desire for us.
God has been so good. He has been sending angels and miracles to make everything so easy and smooth. Yesterday, I met Florence, my brother's good friend and talked about preps for the wedding. She was amazing and so kind helping me out with details I have missed and taken for granted because of ignorance. This is my first wedding so how should I know? LOL :) Anyway, her suggestions were really helpful and I was bursting with so much gladness when she promised to arrange the church and reception venues and fill it with so much royal blue and silver :)
I am so grateful to God for my brother. Out of his generosity and love for his sistah, he promised to pay for the arrangements. He will not be there to share with me this joy of being wed and to help me with tiny details on that day. But he made it sure that before he leaves for his next trip, everything will be ready and his friends will be there to help. He is the best! That why I love him so much!
Another step accomplished before the wedding in July. Thank you Lord for this blessing :)The pair of shoes destined for me is just there waiting and I better start searching.
It has always been my prayer ever since Kit and I started planning for this wedding that God will be there sending angels to guide us in every step we take before that special day. My morning prayer will always be offering all our plans to the Lord and let him sort out whatever is best for the two of us. I pray that whatever we plan and decide it will be His desire for us.
God has been so good. He has been sending angels and miracles to make everything so easy and smooth. Yesterday, I met Florence, my brother's good friend and talked about preps for the wedding. She was amazing and so kind helping me out with details I have missed and taken for granted because of ignorance. This is my first wedding so how should I know? LOL :) Anyway, her suggestions were really helpful and I was bursting with so much gladness when she promised to arrange the church and reception venues and fill it with so much royal blue and silver :)
I am so grateful to God for my brother. Out of his generosity and love for his sistah, he promised to pay for the arrangements. He will not be there to share with me this joy of being wed and to help me with tiny details on that day. But he made it sure that before he leaves for his next trip, everything will be ready and his friends will be there to help. He is the best! That why I love him so much!
Another step accomplished before the wedding in July. Thank you Lord for this blessing :)The pair of shoes destined for me is just there waiting and I better start searching.
Friday, November 25, 2011
of blessings and wedges
Thank you Lord for everything. This week is really overflowing with blessings.
I passed the first oral defense for my thesis because of YOU Lord. I could not make it without you. Everything went smoothly that Wednesday afternoon because you were there in that room through the words I have spoken. You were there as I looked in the eyes of my panelists who at first glance...you feel like you are about to be eaten alive. But they were gentle...and kind and whose comments are formative and helpful. Like a father's words to his child.
I was standing for the whole two hours wearing my brown strapped wedge feeling not even a single hint of leg pain. It was like wearing Jesus' sandals on my feet while walking in an endless road. It was the longest two hour journey of my life. When they gave the verdict that I passed after final deliberation, it was like finding a bus stop at the end of the road after the nonstop walking..where I was able to have a big sigh of relief. God, you were there in that journey never leaving me until I reached my destination.
Today, I received the Holy Spirit through confirmation. Wearing my red wedges with a flesh colored dress, I was sealed by the gift of the Holy spirit and it was one of the memorable occasions of my life with Kuya Gil as my ninong. My pair of wedges was flaming in red as I received this gift for the second time. Thank you for this one special moment Lord. Now I'm ready for the sacrament of Matrimony with a new pair of blue wedges perhaps? :)
I look forward to more blessings to come in wedges. I will continue to be grateful LORD and will always remain humble.... for you are the source of all these. Thank you Lord!
I passed the first oral defense for my thesis because of YOU Lord. I could not make it without you. Everything went smoothly that Wednesday afternoon because you were there in that room through the words I have spoken. You were there as I looked in the eyes of my panelists who at first glance...you feel like you are about to be eaten alive. But they were gentle...and kind and whose comments are formative and helpful. Like a father's words to his child.
I was standing for the whole two hours wearing my brown strapped wedge feeling not even a single hint of leg pain. It was like wearing Jesus' sandals on my feet while walking in an endless road. It was the longest two hour journey of my life. When they gave the verdict that I passed after final deliberation, it was like finding a bus stop at the end of the road after the nonstop walking..where I was able to have a big sigh of relief. God, you were there in that journey never leaving me until I reached my destination.
Today, I received the Holy Spirit through confirmation. Wearing my red wedges with a flesh colored dress, I was sealed by the gift of the Holy spirit and it was one of the memorable occasions of my life with Kuya Gil as my ninong. My pair of wedges was flaming in red as I received this gift for the second time. Thank you for this one special moment Lord. Now I'm ready for the sacrament of Matrimony with a new pair of blue wedges perhaps? :)
I look forward to more blessings to come in wedges. I will continue to be grateful LORD and will always remain humble.... for you are the source of all these. Thank you Lord!
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
barefoot
I was staring blankly at my computer with thoughts wandering nowhere and too tired of thinking when suddenly I felt the need to remove my shoes to release that something inside me that I can't explain.
I love the feel of my feet on the cold floor and the cooling sensation it brings to my legs. Sitting here alone in this corner of this unlit room, removing my shoes was like stepping into an enchanted world...a place where I can be myself...barefoot...relaxed...dancing like a princess...singing and shouting to my heart's content...undaunted by the time and demands of the real world I came from.
Barefoot means freedom. It's 2 days more to go before the semestral break that have been dying to have. I felt so choked up by the people around here...the things demanded from me and the thesis i have to finish by this week. Last night, without hesitations, I went straight from the meeting to Quirino Ave. to look for that new small hotel around the area. The time I stepped inside the cozy lobby of Midori Inn, I felt that it was home for me. After 15 minutes inside, I just booked myself with a one night stay this saturday and left the inn with a feeling of freedom.
I want to be away from home....I want to be alone and be able to finish the thesis that I have to complete. I need this time alone to be with myself...to look back and think about my future.
I need this like my tired and restless feet needing the comforts of the tiled floor.
I love the feel of my feet on the cold floor and the cooling sensation it brings to my legs. Sitting here alone in this corner of this unlit room, removing my shoes was like stepping into an enchanted world...a place where I can be myself...barefoot...relaxed...dancing like a princess...singing and shouting to my heart's content...undaunted by the time and demands of the real world I came from.
Barefoot means freedom. It's 2 days more to go before the semestral break that have been dying to have. I felt so choked up by the people around here...the things demanded from me and the thesis i have to finish by this week. Last night, without hesitations, I went straight from the meeting to Quirino Ave. to look for that new small hotel around the area. The time I stepped inside the cozy lobby of Midori Inn, I felt that it was home for me. After 15 minutes inside, I just booked myself with a one night stay this saturday and left the inn with a feeling of freedom.
I want to be away from home....I want to be alone and be able to finish the thesis that I have to complete. I need this time alone to be with myself...to look back and think about my future.
I need this like my tired and restless feet needing the comforts of the tiled floor.
memories of Boracay
Coycoy And me in Boracay Slideshow: Cherryl’s trip from Davao, Mindanao, Philippines to Boracay was created by TripAdvisor. See another Boracay slideshow. Take your travel photos and make a slideshow for free.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
treasures in a box
With a few days more left before I finally delete (temporarily of course!) the vacation mode in my current status, an urgent need for a formal school shoes prompted me this morning to open the dusty shoe boxes in my room. These boxes, carefully kept on top of my closet are the homes of the most precious possessions and sacred things in my life- my shoes.
As soon as I set my eyes on these once lovely pairs that graced my tiny feet in many places and occasions I have been … I instantly felt a painful shot of guilt in my heart realizing that I have taken for granted things in my whirlwind life which are sacred and indispensably special.
What made the feeling even stronger was the realization that came from a new colleague of mine whose huge feat mirrored what I had dreamt to have and accomplish in the past- a lifelong dream I have totally taken for granted like my shoes in the box.
Writing was one of my earliest passions which came to life during essay writing contests in elementary to journalism in high school. Dreams were born out of this simple passion for creatively designing a Monalisa of written words. Some of those dreams were achieved, some were not even close to reality but some are still secretly hiding in the shoe boxes of heart’s desires. I have triumphed over qualifying to a national writing contest, mourned over not getting a creative writing course in college but still never stopped dreaming of having a published article in a national newspaper.
Writing is just like any other shoes in the box. You have to polish and clean it to restore and magnify the beauty it adds to your walking…you have to hold it dear to your heart to always continue to feed you with simple pleasures and joy….and you have to use and wear it to boost the glory it brings to your life.
Shoes, books and writing are my life’s passions….my treasures in the box. Its time to bring them out to shine!
As soon as I set my eyes on these once lovely pairs that graced my tiny feet in many places and occasions I have been … I instantly felt a painful shot of guilt in my heart realizing that I have taken for granted things in my whirlwind life which are sacred and indispensably special.
What made the feeling even stronger was the realization that came from a new colleague of mine whose huge feat mirrored what I had dreamt to have and accomplish in the past- a lifelong dream I have totally taken for granted like my shoes in the box.
Writing was one of my earliest passions which came to life during essay writing contests in elementary to journalism in high school. Dreams were born out of this simple passion for creatively designing a Monalisa of written words. Some of those dreams were achieved, some were not even close to reality but some are still secretly hiding in the shoe boxes of heart’s desires. I have triumphed over qualifying to a national writing contest, mourned over not getting a creative writing course in college but still never stopped dreaming of having a published article in a national newspaper.
Writing is just like any other shoes in the box. You have to polish and clean it to restore and magnify the beauty it adds to your walking…you have to hold it dear to your heart to always continue to feed you with simple pleasures and joy….and you have to use and wear it to boost the glory it brings to your life.
Shoes, books and writing are my life’s passions….my treasures in the box. Its time to bring them out to shine!
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